I felt as though I was using my friend's nudity (and inherent vulnerability) to find a pleasing image and an artistic voice without even considering her relationship with her visual self, and that really upset me. I feel as though I haven't come to any conclusions about how to depict women in any other way than what I have experienced personally. Shockey: Well, I think it's clear that I look at women's bodies with desire, but I also have a female body, and I know what it feels like to be made vulnerable by someone's eyes.
I switched my project and started using my own body to try to figure out what it felt like to be the person represented and the person doing the representing and how that dynamic is different or the same depending on our attractions. It's just so complicated, and I'll probably forever be exploring the dynamic of agency and observation.
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For instance, I was out one night, and I went to use the bathroom, and there were two women in there going at it, surrounded by empty liquor bottles, and I thought, "Holy shit, this is like St. Sometimes I'm thinking about the misunderstandings of sex (especially lesbian) that shape our desires and our experiences of self-confidence and self-worth.
The style is very illustrative, not at all abstract. When I first moved to New York, I went out a lot and got involved in the lesbian hookup culture.
I reference classical drawings and great contemporary lesbian photography, using mostly graphite and stitching into fabric and paper, the mediums I learned from my mom when I was young. I started noticing these classical relationships being acted out between women (and men) and that really intrigued me.
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It's confusing growing up surrounded and enclosed by assumptions of heterosexuality. I've been insanely lucky to grow up and come of age in liberal communities.